Chris DeSantis
Election Reflection

I can’t remember when I first heard the phrase “voting against their own interest”. I believe that politics are incepted at a formative age, such that unless you have some dramatic reversal in your adult life it is hard to know where things began.

Chris DeSantis
Something is Better Than Nothing

Which brings me to the topic of today’s blog. It’s wonderful to know what is ideal. What you would do if you could isolate one variable in your life? Decisions never actually fall so neatly where you can simply elect to do the optimal thing.

Chris DeSantis
USA Swimming Hiring Backwards

What does strike me as strange is that before this announcement USA Swimming had three crucial roles they were hiring for. One is the CEO, with Tim Hinchey’s long awaited sacking. Then there is the National Team Director who will oversee that entirety of the “wet” side of the operation. Finally there is the National Junior Team coach.

Chris DeSantis
Harmony, Not Balance

Earlier this week I posted a podcast with three-time US Olympic coach Greg Meehan. It’s worth listening to. There’s two things I want to comment with regards to the podcast.

Chris DeSantis
What I'm Up To

One of the many advantages of working for yourself is that you can change directions fast. Last spring, I reached a point where it was time to make a change. One of the reasons that I work for myself is because it allows me the latitude to spend time engaging more with people in all corners of the swimming world.

selflessness

The Selflessness Switch

The question was "How do people with jobs that require pessimism: lawyers, firemen, policemen, turn that switch off in the rest of their lives?". It was posed to Martin Seligman, the father of Positive Psychology and the man behind "Learned Optimism".

It was a stumper. Seligman is man with many answers but he couldn't conjure a satisfying response to this one. Lawyers, who must imagine the worst possible outcomes for their clients and do everything to prevent it, or policemen, who must imagine the worst possible threats to their own and others safety, must somehow find a way to flip into a completely different mindset when they put their job down for the day.

It made me think about coaching, a job that doesn't require pessimism. It does, however, on many levels require selflessness. Coaches feel a strong pull to day in, day out, put themselves out to the athletes in their charge and not always get the same in return. Which begs the question: how can coaches switch their selflessness enough to be their best selves?

Too much of a good thing

Some of the best coaches I know are selfless to a fault. Let me explain. They are suffering from health problems related to their lack of self-care. I recognize the trap because I've fallen into it too many times to count.

The last time I can remember was a year ago. My mother was dying of a brain tumor, and I had the time and flexibility to pour myself into caring for her. I didn't set good boundaries. Before I knew it I was deep down in a hole, deeper than I'd ever been in my life. 

The best coaches I know can tell a similar story. About how they don't make time to exercise but are there for every kid they coach (including running extra practice for Allie so she can go to that lecture). Or how they've foregone relationships because it was just too hard to fit into their coaching schedule with so many nights and weekends.

Or how they've stayed and coached a team because they felt such strong loyalty to the swimmers that they work with their, sacrificing a better life for their own family so that other families can thrive.

I certainly don't have an answer, but I want to start looking for one. Coaches need a selflessness switch, a way to turn off the thing that makes them so great for the athletes they coach for long enough to be great to themselves.